There’s nothing quite like that feeling when our Heavenly Father’s Spirit pricks your heart and says,
“Why haven’t I been first in your life lately? Your heart has not been desiring my will above all else.”
My heart sank when I heard this, and I instantly felt awful. I was tempted to shove Him out of my mind, and carry on about my morning.
What a mistake that would have been.
I made myself french toast, and ate it despite the fact that guilt was eating away my appetite. I slowly began to pray little by little, confessing and asking for forgiveness – I could feel God’s gentle but rough hands work on my heart. It hurt. I wanted to stop praying and continue going on about my day, but I knew that I needed to do more.
I went upstairs, opened my Bible and journal, and began an intimate conversation with my Lord. I didn’t hear His voice per se, but He showed Himself to me in His word – and in my weakness. I am so thankful that when I am weak, then I am strong (2 Corinthians 12:10)! I need His strength every day, because I am weak every day. So very weak – and selfish. Instead of allowing God to reign in my heart, I have let certain desires of mine to take the throne. There are things that I want, and I want them now. I haven’t been patient with God’s timing… But what good reason do I have to not wait joyfully, peacefully, and obediently? Our Father’s timing is perfect and good. So, I will wait.
Upon asking for forgiveness this morning and dwelling on who God is, I was reminded of how His mercies are new every morning. As Lamentations 3:22-23 (ESV) says,
22 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
23 they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
How wonderful is that? In the NIV translation, verse 22 is worded like this: “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.”
Oh, hallelujah :).
These verses also got me to thinking about how I should reflect God’s character, and also be merciful every day. As I said in my Facebook status,
“If God’s mercies are new every morning, then ours should be, too. This means no grudges. This means forgiveness. This means giving grace as it has been given to us.”
(I just quoted myself. Is that weird? I think it’s a little weird.)
I ended my journal entry this morning by listing four things that I was thankful for. To end this blog post, I’ll share the list with you:
- God’s renewed mercy every morning
- His love
- His gentle Spirit
- His word
Drowning in His mercy,